Remembering a painful past

It’s very frustrating to read this book. I have personal experience in being rejected by black peers simply because I did well in school and was friends with white people. The neighborhood I live in is predominantly white, but my hometown does have a black section. I still feel disconnected from most black students at the high school. I’m not the biggest fan of hip-hop and the culture behind it. That’s just not me. Also the fact that I talked “white” didn’t help me relate to my black peers. This disconnect caused a great isolation from both the white and black community. I have often been called white and have never had the courage to speak up against it. Reading this book makes me revisit those times in my life and this book has given me the courage to speak up. I recently started discussing the issues of race with some of my white friends and it was refreshing as well as frustrating. One of my best friends, a girl I’ve known since third grade couldn’t seem to understand why I was upset about someone calling me white. She claimed that they were just stereotypes and that they are there for a reason. Of course, stereotypes do have some degree of truth in them, but the fact that people who personally know a black person, such as myself and place me in the white category angers me because they should know that all black people aren’t what the media says we are. Although much anger has come out of reading this book, I will venture to say that it is important and necessary to talk about race and hopefully the anger will subside and courage will push all of us to talk about race with our family and our friends.

But I Don't Think of You As Black...

One of the blogs I frequent, Resist Racism, has an excellent post up today entitled, "The Other Side," and has to do with black people and self esteem. One particularly interesting paragraph said:

Black people with self-esteem are often told by unenlightened Whites–even some individuals who are liberal and friendly–that we are not “really Black.” In telling us this, these Whites do not see themselves as expressing racism; they feel they are offering us a special place. Yet there is, in these words, an attempt to seduce us away from loving Blackness, to undermine the very self-esteem that, by its existence, eliminates White supremacist domination.

This paragraph reminded me of the time one of my friends and I were discussing my being on BSA's minority panel and she said, "I don't think of you as a minority, you're just my friend." I thought that was quite a revealing statement. Maybe a few years ago, I would've been pleased to hear one of my white friends say that, but now it simply causes me to cringe. Mostly because I've been developing a stronger sense of self-esteem in regards to my blackness and it makes me more frustrated than anything that my being confident in being black is so inconsistent with the stereotypes of blackness that I'm not really seen as black.

While I don't think my friend, or many of the people who say these, "But I don't think of you as black," kind of statements are trying to offend, I don't think they're taking into account the unique experience that is had by minorities in a predominately white environment. Perhaps the dialogue started by Dr. Tatum's book will help to further expose and reveal differences that all too often seem to be ignored by whites, and build more trust on both sides.

Finger-Pointing & Name Calling: CUT IT OUT!

An increasing number of ideas are flooding my brain as it pertains not only to my race and my understanding of what it means to be black, but as it pertains to the status of race relations in our nation and in our world.  In high school, when we covered all three pages of the African American influence in American History we came across the term "reverse racism" and one of my peers jokingly said, "Oh, Brandon! That's you!"  I chuckled at the comment and said in return, "As long as you acknowledge that my racism is a reflection of your racism towards me, we're fine!"  However, as I look back at that exchange between my peer and I, I am not quite sure it was that much of a joking matter.

What is racism?  Well, as defined by Beverly D. Tatum, it is a system (hence the "ism"): a system of advantage solely based on race.  In the past it has been incredibly easy for me to define a person's actions or attitudes as "racist," but I believe that stems from the common mistake of using the terms "prejudice" and "racist" interchangeably.  I could be taking this too far, but I believe I am willing to say that by Tatum's definition, only white individuals can thrive off of the system of racism in America.  Can a person of color be prejudice?  Can a person of color have an "adverse opinion or leaning formed without just grounds or before sufficient knowledge" (Webster), sure!  Persons of color and whites alike can engage in stereotypical judgements or even have a sense of dislike for the other, but only the "majority" (which I think is a problematic term in itself) can truly reap the benefits of racism.  Understand? Well, indulge me a little further...

I had a discussion with a friend (who happened to be a White American) about the idea of racism in America, and the person gave me a response I should have expected.  "Well, I'm not racist! It's not my fault so I shouldn't be penalized for what people did a long time ago..." Although some members of the white community may say that they are in no way racist, and quickly name all three of their close black friends, we (and I say we because it's not "their" problem, it is OUR problem) must still acknowledge that White Americans do reap great benefits of living in a country founded on racist principles.

Whiteness has become the standard by which we live in America, and that makes it incredibly difficult to live a "non-white" life.  Tatum categorizes white persons in the following manner: active bigots, passive bigots, and active anti-racists.  I believe that in the world in which we not live it is quite necessary that more and more individuals become active anti-racists: and for the persons of color shouting "amen" I must say that this applies to us too.  The days of sitting around complaining about the problem and playing the blame game are over! As long as we live in a world that accepts whiteness as the standard there will be work to do, and we have years and years of incorrect thinking to deconstruct.

Looking at racism as a systematic problem helps us to better name the demon with which we are struggling.  For much of my life, racism has been a demon that has been named among individuals and specific organizations. However, acknowledging racism as a system helps us get past some of the finger-pointing and name-calling that prevents us from really accomplishing anything together (Disclaimer: Yes, I do still believe that finger pointing and name calling may be necessary in some extreme cases).  One of the things I have taken for granted in years past is my own history!  My knowledge of my people's history has been limited to the big names that actually make the history books.  

We live in a society where it is incredibly difficult to find positive reflections of ourselves (persons of color) within the curriculum we are taught and the programming that we are given.  My primary and secondary educators taught me from text books that did not spend that much time with the history of black people in America.  I am a product of a society that seems to want to do everything in its power to forget the injustices of the past and forever erase the consequences that past has on our present.  However, ignorance is no longer an excuse!  Just as white persons must be actively anti-racist, persons of color must do that same and actively educate ourselves and others concerning our past and our present.  Far away are the days where we can allow fear and resentment to fuel our lives and interactions with one another.  We must re-learn what it means to be human while embracing our pasts, living in the present, and hoping for a better future.

Those that do not know their pasts are bound to repeat it.  Look around folks!  Can you see the cycle repeating itself?